Over the last 24 hours, I've really been struggling with something. I woke up in the middle of the night (actually my dog woke me up) and could not fall back to sleep. Swirling around in my head the same thing.
How, as a vegan, could I justify carrying a brand new leather handbag?
For the past 11 months, I have become more conscious about what I eat, how I look at the world and the people in it, and the products I use in my house. I have tried to be mindful of the purchases I make at the grocery store and buy local when I can. And I think I've become a much kinder, compassionate and thoughtful person for it.
That said, what did I ask my husband for for Christmas? A very expensive leather handbag. Hmmm. I don't know if it was the lure of the name on the bag, or it's beautiful rich color, or how great I looked when I tried it on. Nonetheless, I asked him for it. And Mr. X, being the wonderful, amazing husband that he is, bought it for me. He tried to be slick by sneaking it in the house when I wasn't looking. But when I went into the closet to get the vacuum cleaner, there was the bag. Staring at me. Willing me to take a quick peak inside. So I did. And there she was, just as beautiful as in the department store.
But over the next two days, something was nagging at me. I couldn't figure it out. Something in the back of my mind just wasn't sitting right with me. Had I forgotten something that needed to get done? What was it?
Then at 4:00am this morning, I realized what it was. The handbag. The thought of carrying a leather handbag was keeping me up at night. Now, I realize, that if this is the biggest worry I have right now, then I'm doing pretty good. I get it. But it was still on my mind.
So this morning, I sheepishly said to Mr. X, "Um, would you be mad if I asked you to return the bag?" I explained why I just couldn't accept it, I'm vegan, it's leather, the cows, blah, blah, blah. No, of course he's not mad, but then added, "But have you felt it??" Umm, yes and it felt great and looked great and smelled great, but please return it to the store as soon as possible. Thank you.
So I've been online looking for a stylish vegan handbag. There are lots actually. So I'm happy to say that I found one and will wear it proudly! And I won't feel guilty about it.
I think it's safe to say that I will sleep well tonight. Mr. X probably will too because he gets to return that very pricey bag!
Peace and love.
